Dear Santa,

For Christmas this year, I would like:

Two hundred KitKat chunkies (full-size not multipack)
Baby Bella to stop shouting 'BUM' in public spaces
A new brother who doesn't fart on me and call it a 'tasty air biscuit'
Antoine or Daniel (I can't decide!) to surprise me on Christmas Day with a grand romantic gesture
Cash (lots of it!)
A new diary (I'm really getting through them!)

Lots of love,

Lottie xxx

PS. Please could you put a chocolate orange instead of a real orange in my stocking this year?